Personally, I think it's a really brave, honest and quite beautiful piece of writing. You may disagree, but I urge you to read it in full. Extracts:
"And you know what? I didn't mind. In fact, as I started to escape the fug I had been in, looked down and noticed my belly, I realised that being fat was kind of cool. Sure, there were downsides. I no longer looked good in jeans. My bra cups were bigger than my head. My tights rubbed together as I walked, making me sound like a particularly large and irritating cricket. But there were pluses, too.
Most of all, being fat meant that I was suddenly cast out of that uniquely depressing dance that goes on - particularly between women - of policing each other's weight."
"I understand why women engage in these conversations, and why we feel that if we don't apologise for the space we take up, we're afraid that someone else will get in first and cut us down. I understand, too, that for some women these conversations are actually a way of highlighting just how thin they are, thus shoring up their place in some vast unspoken pecking order. And while I find it utterly depressing that a woman would feel that her weight - or lack of it - represents her major achievement, given that we live in a society in which women are, on average, paid 17% less than men, make up only a fifth of MPs, a 10th of leading company directors, and have little choice but to watch in horror as less than 6% of reported rape cases end in a conviction, I can understand why women often don't feel that they or their abilities are really valued, and try to assert whatever small slice of power they can through drawing attention to their body by denigrating it. I understand it, and I don't blame anyone who does it, and I have done it myself, but I also really hate it. It is boring. It is tiring. It is sad."
What do you all think? Also, in other publishing news: remember that hilarious letter in W that we posted about here, where the delightful Coral from Denver explained to us all that fat girls like cookies, but not fashion? Well, Saturday's Guardian (why yes, that is all I read...) Weekend section has that letter's complete opposite, I thought I'd share:
"Is there no end to the bossy misogyny of fashion? Of course not. But Hadley Freeman's comments (Looking Good, February 9) on cleavage are naive, too. Doesn't she realise that if you have big breasts, fashion leaves you no option but to wear cleavage as an act of resistance? Nothing fashion makes either fits a voluptuous figure, or looks nice on it, except for the ubiquitous and by now rather dull wrap dresses. If fashion is so bloody clever, why doesn't it come up with things that look nice on us? Oh, and thanks so much for the subtle reinterpretation of the ancient truth that women with big breasts are stupid. We need reminding - we're so dim it still hasn't sunk in yet." Louisa Young, London W12
Louisa, honey, I think I kind of love you.
11 comments:
Actually, if anything, the comments demonstrate that "fat" is perhaps the one, single issue that is NOT a feminist issue. One could argue that the patriarchy is responsible for whatever other ills women face, but not for this. This is a woman-on-woman thing first and foremost, since at least as many men prefer curvy girls as thin ones, and since fashion is the one industry in which heterosexual men have virtually no power. The stigmatization of curves is something that women do to other women.
And actually, if you look at the history of the movement, early feminism always championed the androgynous figure over the curvy figure (boyish flappers not coincidentally parallelled the suffrage movement), because the full figure is a marker of essential biological differences between the genders, which feminism has, for much of its history, attempted to deny.
Not paradoxically, therefore, fuller womanly figures have been MOST celebrated when Western society has been most socially conservative (most traditional -- or patriarchal, if you will), and womanly figures have been celebrated less and less as women have gained power, because (as the writer admits) women have a persistent tendency to resent and attack their curvier rivals.
I have a theory that the the fashion & cosmetic industries are conspiring to oppress women. They keep us busy with trying to perfect ourselve physically, malnourished with fake foods and "diets" that do not have enough calories to support brain function above wondering when our next meal is, and shaming and brainwashing us into believing we are nothing if we are above a size 8 and that no one will ever find us worthy unless we look like they tell us we should. Instead we should be choosing health and healthy self esteem. Doing for ourselves and accomplishing more in our lives than shiny hair and a 24" waist.
I've been overweight most of my life, and frankly I enjoy the social aspect of it. I get out of having to wear make-up or go out to the pub or go shopping for fun. As long as I'm basically clothed and tidy, the only thing most people will ever notice about me is my weight, and I really don't give a shit about those people. I'm glad not to care. It's the upside to being frequently insulted, unable to find nice clothes anyway, and being treated like a moron by doctors.
Three cheers for Louisa! I'm still waiting for someone in the land of high fashion to realise that designing a dress that makes Gisele Bundchen look like a ten-foot-tall glamazon is, in fact, not much of a stretch. How about a dress that hot good on a 5'5" size 14? HMMM? If Gaultier can make a dress to fit Crystal Renn then the rest of fashion-land don't really have an excuse.
google-account, the Victorian era is over. Now, women of all shapes and sizes have lives not based on their ability to please men. We now live in a society where non-whites finally have some recognition for their mental and physical beauties.
Further more, as a feminist, I don't want anybody dictating to me how I should look - from those evil liberal feminists who believe women should be treated like people, and those far-right individuals who think society would be a better place if women would just shut up and get back in the kitchen.
I assume you are from The Judgment of Paris, where anti-progressive screeds against women are humorous at best, and always remind me of some 19th century windbag.
Many of these big women you worship are progressive and feminist, ya know. We've gotten with the times, and are fighting for our place in 'em.
And I guess it's pointless to mention that two of the most popular fat acceptance blogs are dominated by liberal feminist women - and some men too! But I thought I should mention it.
lilacsigil, I don't think people stop noticing how a person is dressed / looks just because they are overweight. Isn't the whole point of this blog about beauty / fashion for people who wear larger sizes? Being fat doesn't exempt people from all those things you mentioned - it just depends on whether or not the person in question wishes to engage in that way. Sure its harder to find clothes and doctors can be jerks but I get dressed up, shop for pleasure and put on my lipgloss every day. I would do those things no matter what size I was at. Being fat isn't some fashion death sentence.
"Actually, if anything, the comments demonstrate that "fat" is perhaps the one, single issue that is NOT a feminist issue. One could argue that the patriarchy is responsible for whatever other ills women face, but not for this."
Interesting points, but I have to take issue with this: feminism, or at least my brand of feminism, doesn't suggest that every problem women face is due to patriarchal oppression.
As you say, fat phobia, or whatever, may be a woman-on-woman thing: how is that not a feminist issue? One doesn't have to be a woman to be a feminist; and one doesn't have to be a feminist to be a woman.
I'd say that when women attack other women, for appearance, clothing, behaviour, weight -- that's the ultimate feminist issue. Because you can't start fighting that oppressive patriarchy until you have solidarity within the gender.
Harriet, you make a very interesting point, and you define feminism in a way that, I will freely admit, I've never considered before. To me, a rather Manichean kind of gender confrontation has always seemed to be one of the core tenets of the feminist movement, but this does give me a different way to look at it.
Perhaps your idea of gender solidarity is a new one. At any rate, it's one which I've not been fortunate enough to encouter yet. It certainly appeals to me. Regrettably, the early history of the movement (Wollstonecraft, for example) is very much marked by its categorization of women into "progressive" or "reactionary" categories, and disparaging the latter. That, sadly, is where the anti-womanly-figure impetus began.
Although I do wonder: If the definition of feminism is extended in this way, then is there a difference between saying "a feminist issue" and "a women's issue"?
Thanks for posting both of these. My roommate in college was of "regular" weight but had very very large breasts. She said that she always felt that she had to try extra extra hard to "prove" to her peers that she wasn't dumb just because of her breasts. She ended up being valedictorian and received an academic scholrship as a result.
sarah, did you ever know that you're my hero?
Post a Comment